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Flowing blood mixes Sleep deeply Carve the guilt in your heart and die as you go. Cherry blossoms in full bloom blooming on my wrist 甘く絡み合う偽り どこも同じ 流れる血が混ざる 深く眠る 罪悪 心に刻み 行きながら死ね 手首に咲く 満開の桜 Tendrement enlacé au mensonge C'est partout pareil Le sang qui coule déborde Je dors profondément Le vice entaillé dans le coeur, je meurs tout en marchant J'ai des fleurs de cerisiers qui me pousse sur le poignet 蜷局 "Couvrir les cicatrices avec des cicatrices" "Obscurité, doute et nature humaine" "Se sollicitent l'un l'autre comme des fous" 我、闇とて･･･ En oubliant la douleur, je m'oublie aussi Pourtant à présent, la preuve que je savoure s'écoule* /// I wish I could share my point of view with someone Loneliness hits harder than usual, maybe is it the cold colour of the sky that make me feel this way ? Humans aren't mean to live isolated but I keep distancing myself from my lover's one to not getting hurt. To not seeing myself vulnerable. I am thinking too much. Where was the time when love was a simple feeling ? Relationships kill my heart and I'm seeking for it again. //// LUSTING Frigid and pale, my hands are tied behind my back. I can hear his footsteps echoing behind me. The light glistens on my skin from the grate above. He burns me with his cigarette, guiding me with pain. And he stood there, watching, lusting. His desire for human flesh is potent in the air. No one will ever hurt me the way you do. His cold touch grazes my cheek before his fingers enter my mouth. His scent is hypnotizing. Sweat pours down the edge of my back. He grabs my hair, pulling my head backward and whispers into my ear. “I want to watch you suffer.” “I want to feel your pain.” He turns around, revealing his scars all over his body. No one will ever hurt me the way you do. *** SADIST *** Carve your name into my skin. The lacerations open as he drags the glass down my arm, leaving the shard stained in blood. The air grows cold. I couldn't bear it. I couldn't bear reality. His tongue caresses the open wound, I feel his hands wrap around my neck. Bringing a sense of stillness, the wind passes through the broken window above as I suffocate to death. ____________________ A life misled. My body, so still. The stagnant blood surrounds me. I find peace in silence. In a search for a “God”. Another state of being. I search for heaven in the ceiling, but all I’ve found is an endless sea of black. I feel myself letting go. I submit myself to what the world chose for me. My eyes roll back. The terror begins. I follow the light. There’s nothing at the end. 蜷局TOGURO gaze Experiencing nothing but a loss of control is painful I’m finding it hard to breathe; I'm being choked This exposed wound drips with misplaced affection
~~~ * ~~~ Cigarette in his mouth, he crossed the street at a red light, his eyes tightly closed. As usual, deep down, he secretly wished to be hit by a truck, hands in pockets, breathing calmly. Go on and crush me. He walked straight ahead. Stay calm. Breathe. The bus stopped. No luck. He continued on his way, and once his head was engulfed in the crowd, the looks turned towards his imposing stature, his natural eccentricity, his fiery hair with the scent of stale tobacco, sweat, and shame. The city is noisy on sunny mornings. Normal humans go shopping, occupy themselves with distractions, enter stores, buy products only to end up unhappy and eventually blame themselves. It's not even their fault. They drool over things they don't really need, as their closets overflow with useless clothes of mediocre quality, manufactured by exploited factory workers. They buy useless things and pretend to belong to a social class, they speak loudly, too much, they boast or complain about their lives without taking the time to listen to others. They don't even mean to, it's not even their fault. Society has conditioned them this way. We live in an era which everything around us seems absolutely normal and acceptable, we are just so used to it, and it would require too much effort to change things. We are victims of our own fate. But we are weak and afraid of change. So we find it easier to lock ourselves in our illusion, which accidentally becomes our reality. Many people are stuck between this false reality and nurture their own little fiction of the world without caring about the real problem. There are far too many of us who are completely lost in this infernal cycle. But not me. I wouldn't get lost. Because I have no road to follow. The path I decided to walk on, I'll keep continue this way. And I'm aware that my body and heart could be torn apart or shattered on the dirty asphalt of a boiling city by a random accident that could simply happen. A total coincidence. Losing my life along the way. ~~~ * ~~~ « To live is to take risks. »
Mournful Wilderness If colors of spring, savage in my calm, were something I could forget, I would immerse my eyes in the beauty of degradation, and only laugh because of my solitude Colours of spring are for others–holding my breath, I swim through the mire As expected, drowning when I can swim is pointless Through this hand that kills reality, I could’ve easily inflicted damage I fill in my name Decayed roots stir the water’s surface, gears turning as though warped I hearken to the grating sound and wonder, can they neatly go off course? Everything is a shallow sea of taboos, so impure that I mistake it with brilliance Goodbye, I fall through lawless darkness Goodbye, this is the end Tears, a rain of lamentation, overflow every time I face nothingness And words I’m composing blur Tears, eventually they’ll dry and I’ll be killed by silence At the end of this game of shadow tag, I lose my mind Decayed roots stir the water’s surface, gears turning as though warped Throwing myself towards the grating sound, I noticed, I noticed that I look like that Tears, a rain of lamentation, overflow every time I face nothingness And words I’m composing blur Tears, they fall with loneliness, and if I’m to live in silence I bear in mind I’m never to laugh again There is me who loved you There is me who stared at you There is me who sought you There is me who lost you There is you who loved me There is you who stares at me There is you who broke me There is you who seized me There is you who killed me